The Grandmother From Nuttyprofessor Funny Quotes
"Nutty Professor II: The Klumps" quotes
(2000)
Title Nutty Professor II: The Klumps
Year 2000
Director Peter Segal
Genre Sci-Fi, Comedy, Romance
Plot – Professor Sherman Klump is getting married and the whole clan is excited. Girlfriend Denise, with her insatiable appetite, is looking forward to become part of the family; Mama Klump says it's a fairy tale; Dad Klump is less grumpy than usual and Grandma smiles at the thought of her beloved Sherman finally in an intimate relationship. Even Ernie has agreed to a ceasefire until the wedding. Everything seems to be going fine, but Sherman's evil alter ego, who he created in the laboratory with a chemical formula, is back and now aims for his independence.
All actors – Eddie Murphy, Janet Jackson, Larry Miller, John Ales, Richard Gant, Anna Maria Horsford, Melinda McGraw, Jamal Mixon, Gabriel Williams, Chris Elliott, Duffy Taylor, Earl Boen
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"Nutty Professor II: The Klumps" Quotes 14 quotes
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- Granny Klump: The other day I got out of the shower, I bent down to reach for a towel and I felt a sharp pain in my chest. Shot through my chest and up around my shoulder and down my spine. I thought "Oh, Lord". I thought I was dying. I bent over and looked, and I was standing on my own titty.
- Mama Klump: You don't need a breast reduction,... (continue) (continue reading) -
"If it isn't the world's oldest living Negro! Hey, how are things going on the Underground Railroad, Isaac?"
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"- Papa Klump: I don't want to hear about you, old-ass geriatrics.
- Granny Klump: Oh, yeah, Cletus? Me and Isaac might be dried up geriatrics, but ain't nothing wrong with Isaac's love tackle.
- Ernie Klump: Oh snap, now.
- Granny Klump: What's the matter Cletus, cat got your tongue? Did I step on a nerve, Cletus? I get ya, got ya, got ya!"
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If I want to put a trumpet in my ass and run around this restaurant and blow, then, "Hallelujah! Yankee Doodle!", that's my business!
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"- Jason: You're losing your intelligence, sir.
- Sherman Klump: Yeah, I know. I can't even beat Molly and she's the dumbest hampster we got!"
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"You wanna know what's permanent, Sherman? You know what's permanent? I'll tell you. What me and your momma got. That's permanent. That ain't going no place. You know what I mean? I'll tell you, boy. If you find you a woman that loves you, that really really loves you, you gotta hold onto that, Sherman."
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"Viagra don't work for me. I've been taking 'em like M&Ms."
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"That doesn't matter to me. What matters to me is that you're kind and decent. You are the most brilliant man I've ever known."
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"- Mama Klump: Oh my goodness! Is there a fire?
- Fireman Stripper: Yes, ma'am. I'm afraid there is.
- Mama Klump: I don't smell no smoke.
- Fireman Stripper: There's a fire in my pants, and it's getting muy caliente!" -
"- Papa Klump: What I do in my bedroom is my business, you understand that?
- Granny Klump: The only thing you do in your bedroom is pull the lint off your scrotum!"
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- Granny Klump: Cletus, have you ever heard the expression "mercy hump"?
- Papa Klump: Say what?
- Granny Klump: 'Cause that's what you've been getting all these years - mercy humps.
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"- Papa Klump: What's wrong with you, woman? Don't you wanna be young?
- Mama Klump: No, Cletus, I don't wanna be young! Cletus, we are supposed to be who we are and I'm just fine with who I am! But obviously what you're trying to say is that you're just tired of the fat old woman that you got married to!"
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"- Sherman Klump: Buddy Love, I am sick and tired, of your S-H...
- Dean Richmond: I.
- Sherman Klump: Thank you. T-E!
- Buddy Love: Oh, ho-ho-ho. My shite?"
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"It's funny how you get used to certain things in life. You get used to being overweight. I know I did. You even get used to people making fun of you. Somewhere along the line, I got used to being alone. And I just don't want to be alone anymore."
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